Love Letters

Now for your enjoyment, two love letters.

My dearest Haley,

I love you like I love pudding, even though you are not sticky and yummy like pudding.

Your eyes are like beautiful volcanoes errupting from the soul, perfect and oozing like a zit.

Your hair is the color of pudding, silky cascading overlapping pie as of satin bark.

Your lips are magnificent and though I'm not sure, I bet they taste like pudding.

You are the most lovely and perfect and beautiful and complete and musical person I know, my pudding. Please do me the honor of going to the homecoming dance with me.

Your secret admirer,

Elton John

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dearest Sagen,

Why do you hide our love from your friends? Are you ashamed of my fame, fortune, and polished yet boyishly good looks? Or maybe my hoards of squealing fangirls who luv me and think I'm hawtt and want to marry me? I know there are a lot of them, baby, and when that 3rd grader ripped out that chunk of your hair I know she didn't mean it, her mom said she thought those SweeTarts were Ritalin OMG LOL. Ok so now a poem 4 u. It doesn't rhyme but hey I graduated 6th grade didn't I LOL ROFL!!11oneone

Sagen, by RYAN SEACREST

Your cheeks prattle in a red symitar

of blush volcanoes

Because Iiii'mm soooo in loooove wit u

When you are not near my

handsomely buff and tanned side

I cry and am muchly saddened

And my eyes leak sadness like two

superfluous waterfalls of pain

And you are way way gorgeouser

Than Kelly Clarkson

Or even Clay Aiken maybe I think

So baby girl when I'm with you

I'M FLYING WITHOUT WIIIIINGS

Yeah yeah ooh yeah yeah ooh

THE END

<3 Ryan Seacrest

2003-08-19 @ 12:37 a.m.

prev | next